ABOUT US
The Narcisist At Large
Primordial youth forever washing away the filth of life, for it is true, I have always intended to immortalize myself by capturing the essence of the greater most refined aspects of my being. But even after so many years of experience it is still sometimes truly hard to accept -so much humiliation have I caused myself (and continue to cause myself) through so many ridiculous actions, as well as with the mere arbitrary expression of so much vile and whimsical thinking.
What I mean to say is that in my Narcisistic whirlwind I’m still cringing with an artificial vanity so deep that I’m bordering along the lines of self hatred and loathing for even my most human and seemingly incorrigible imperfections. It boils down to this, nothing has ever been good enough, nor will it ever be. Hence, I can’t find a way to adequately love myself. And furthermore, I am so self absorbed that I don’t know how to love, therefore I can’t be loved, I am as hard as stone, trapped in aquatic reflection.
So there you have it, ones Narcisism is a very powerful thing indeed. It represents our search for a true identity as but another mystery which resonates, deep inside our mortal fibers, the perfect divinity of a soul. One can’t help but be bewildered, or even astonished, for it is like the sweetest song you ever heard, but never to be played again, and like the forgotten memories of so many special days by gone. You’ve internalized something but you’ve missed something as well. In which case, what is a man to do aside from baptizing himself inside of his very own watery reflection while making allusions toward a stairway to heaven.
At first glance, it would all appear quite see through, the advent of self conceit, the infatuation with self assurity. But in all actuality, there isn’t anything transparent about it. In fact, it’s very concrete, perfectly still, yet it’s very elusive, as if it were always in motion, a beautiful butterfly daring you to take hold of its magic and eternity.
September 24th, 2008 at 7:10 pm
Kris this is so true yet people are so blind to see whats in front of them.